Use Twitter to network and receive more romantic introductions.

1. Create your Sparkbliss bio and include links such as your Twitter, LinkedIn, and Flickr pages.

2. Create a Tweet which embeds your private Bio URL link to share it with your trusted friends.

3. Ask your Twitter network to play matchmaker for you.

Good luck!

Many people wrongly assume that using an online dating service is the equivalent of throwing in the towel and screaming, “All right already, I’ll do it — I’m desperate!”

Actually, online dating is not for the desperate.

Research shows that more than 40 million Americans (40% of all singles) use online dating services. It has become a very successful way to meet someone who is compatible.

Many online dating services are even hiring psychologists to help with their personality profiles. They want to make sure that they have scientific studies to back their matching programs.

But online dating comes with some particular issues. Here are some simple do’s and don’ts for making online dating easier and more successful.

Rejections.  Don’t take “no” responses from others online personally. You may find that you send a lot of “hello” messages, with no replies. The truth is that some people date online more for entertainment than to meet their soul mate. Also, feel free to say “no” to anyone online. And if you don’t want your profile found by students, colleagues or clients, try one of the private online dating services.

Honesty.  Last week, one Free Press reader shared with me his frustration that the women he met in person did not match their profiles. Some people aren’t honest and don’t post recent photos. But be advised, you need to be truthful when describing yourself. Outright lying just won’t work — it’ll blow up in your face when your date learns you are not 25 or a personal trainer.

Take your time.  Studies show that relationships develop faster online. My advice is to wait at least one week before you meet face-to-face. And, before you meet in person, move the conversation from online to phone. During a phone chat you’ll get a better sense of whether your personalities click.

Safety rules.  There are several rules to remember. First, when you give someone your phone number online, use your cell, rather than your home or work phone. If things don’t work out, cell phone numbers are much easier to change. Next, if you do meet in person, always pick a neutral busy spot like a coffee shop or a mall. Don’t have your date pick you up or drive you home. Also, tell a friend where you are going to meet this person, what time and your date’s name. Finally, don’t drink too much on the first meeting. People seem much more attractive and interesting after a few glasses of wine and it’s easier to say or do something you didn’t plan on doing.

Dr. Terri Orbuch is a marriage and family therapist, Oakland University professor and research professor at the University of Michigan . She also is the host of “The Love Doctor” talk radio program on the VoiceAmerica network. E-mail her at torbuch@freepress.com.

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I have to admit it is quick and easy!

You’ve heard it all before.  60 is the new 50 and 50 the new 40.  It’s no news.

Looking young may be one thing, but feeling and acting it is an entirely different issue. There’s no denying that the frenetic pace that work and society demands can add undue pressures on a person, but ever wonder how it can affect your dating life?

The good news for prime singles is that they’re not alone. According to the American Association of Retired People, there are an estimated 85 million baby boomers in North America, and 30 percent of the boomer population is single. And many, approximately 63% according to a recent A.A.R.P. study, are actively dating.
 
However, the difficulty for boomers re-entering the dating scene is that it’s a totally different playing field than the one to which they are accustomed.  Part of the reason is that marriage is not the top priority for many singles in the fifty plus category, many of whom have lived through divorce and experienced parenthood.  Add to this longer life expectancies, padded savings accounts and technology, and it’s no wonder people’s habits are shifting.

A quick cup of coffee does not seem to cut it anymore at least for candidates who are trying to connect without compromise. Observes single-living lifestyle expert, Sherri Langburt: “Singles in the 50+ set are more active and vibrant than ever before and are seeking companions who share that sense of adventure and spirit.” 

How to enhance your prospects:  All is fair in love and war but how can you maximize your dating efforts and returns, in a time when age is just a number? 

Take a Cue from Celebrities: First comes marriage, and at 60 comes fatherhood. It’s easy to pass judgment on celebrities but it’s those famous folks, like Michael Douglas, who have paved the way for the rest of us in proving that new beginnings are possible for everyone. Remember if you move forward with faith (and good planning), love can happen at any age.
 
Learn How to Break Boundaries: Women dating younger; men allowing themselves to be courted. These are just a couple of ways which demonstrate how far we have come. If you want to take control of your love life, do away with the rule book on which you were raised and keep an open mind and willing heart.
 
Do What Feels Good to You: Self-awareness is one of the greatest benefits that comes with maturity, and with that comes the knowledge of your likes and dislikes. Relationships surely require compromise, but it’s important to be true to what satisfies you. So if going to the opera or hitting the gym is what you like to do, then keep doing it! Leading a more fulfilled life will result in a happier you and open the possibility of meeting a like-minded mate.
 
Embrace New Channels: One in three unmarried boomers are trying to hook up through online personals and dating sites because they can meet people with similar interests, according to a recent study by the Leger Marketing survey. So if you’ve tried everything, including continuing education courses, volunteering, professional networking groups and social clubs, yet haven’t had much luck, then it’s time to go online to expand your search. Internet dating services may seem scary at first but matchmaking sites can open up a whole new world of opportunity for lovelorn singles.
 
Plan Properly: Now even though we all have our own, or know of standard go-to date spots, some people may want something more exciting than a cup of coffee, so try to get to know your audience. You should choose a place/activity that is conducive to talking - - save the movies, loud bars or concerts for later. Wine, cheese, piano or museum bars are all great choices. If dinner is an option, try to select a casual and comfortable place, where you can enjoy small bites such as Spanish Tapas or Greek Mezzes. And don’t be too fast to rule out the day-date. A long walk in a scenic setting followed by lunch at an outdoor cafe can seal the deal for your second date!

 [For singles who know there's life beyond dating, SingleEdition.com offers a lifestyle destination that embraces the culture of single living.]

Are blogs a thing of the past?  Do you prefer Twitter?

Twitter is essentially a micro-blog, but as such is that more to your liking…are little bite-size chunks of news what you want?

Please share your thoughts and follow us on Twitter.

Today, the New York Times published an interesting story by Stephanie Clifford. 

Apparently, I am not the only person alarmed by a lack of online privacy.  With the convergence of personal information and rapid growth of the Internet, online privacy has become a dominant concern for many Americans.

“More than 90 percent of respondents called online privacy a “really” or “somewhat” important issue, according to the survey of more than 1,000 Americans conducted by TRUSTe.”

The average person discloses personal information online without knowledge or consideration.  While many leading sites suggest they are increasing default security and privacy settings, don’t expect their policies to change any time soon.

“For instance, only 15 percent of respondents read Web site privacy statements most of the time. Fewer than half frequently checked whether sites even had privacy statements, the survey said.”

Should you as an individual be wholly responsible for protecting your own privacy?  Not in my opinion.

Many online dating sites require a profile photo.  In contrast, Sparkbliss (http://www.sparkbliss.com) and Private Online Dating® do not.  Whether or not it is required, why join a dating site and not share your photo?

Let’s be honest, traditional online dating is all about pictures.  You might just as well concede your online dating profile is superficial and totally subjective.  To not publish at least one photo is simply counter-productive.  On the other hand, if your privacy matters and you don’t want your dating persona reduced to a photo then consider Private Online Dating® where the emphasis is references and testimonials, less photos.

I did this experiment with my friend Karen; she added a collection of tasteful bikini photos to her dating profile where no photo previously existed.  To her surprise, but certainly not mine the response was overwhelming.  Suffice to say, she kept the photos on her profile which has now made online dating her full-time job.  I’d be concerned with the random people she meets, but she is quite vigilant about background checks before she meets anybody. 

Per my research, many online daters object to photo requirements.  “This is the biggest complaint;” according to the president of a well-established dating site which has a photo requirement.  I heard a similar story from Cat’s Call who was asked “Why does my online dating site require photos?”  Cat’s response: “I think people SHOULD post photos, even on Sparkbliss.”  My response: “If you are going to swim in the public internet pool then plan to get wet and surrender control of personal information.”

If you don’t want your photo found on a dating site there is an alternative.  While most dating sites publish a shared database of dating profiles for all to see, Sparkbliss and Private Online Dating® does not utilize a shared member database.  With Sparkbliss, each member has control over who sees their profile. 

While photos are essential to traditional online dating, they are optional and far less consequential to Private Online Dating®.  Sparkbliss is based upon a referral model where each member seeks romantic introductions from their private network of trusted friends and family.  Therefore, references and testimonials help to reciprocally form impressions versus subjective and superficial photos.     

Thoughts?

I’ll support that “online dating” has become mainstream behavior; however I don’t feel its stigma has completely evaporated. 

Many dating pundits will tell you otherwise, but you certainly don’t hear people boasting they’ve signed up for eHarmony or match.com like it is a cool thing to do.

What do you think?

Cassie Hepler and her quest for “the one” (or something like it) will never die.  She writes the following as the Philadelphia Sex & Relationships Examiner:

Ahhh, the expedited service of an online love generation. I love those new commercials by Dentyne that proclaim “make face time” and then an instant message noise. It’s a piece of mint-flavored tasty advertising aimed at a digital generation who hasn’t the time for met-you-at-the-park love.

So then, what to do… what to do? Why join an online love searching community complete with pre-screened matches selected just for you. Of course we have the old stand-by match.com, the soul-searching eharmony.com for those marriage-minded souls who are straight which caused a ruckus among the gay community, okcupid.com for the horny crew out there complete with a bang or pass game (classy, eh?). And let’s not forget the site solicited to me at sparkbliss.com, a more private community of people who don’t want to be outed while searching for love online. (Read more about sparkbliss here http://www.examiner.com/x-4085-DC-Dating-Examiner~y2009m2d24-An-internet-daters-right-to-privacy.)

And let’s not forget myspace.com for all the kids out there - the new (or shall I say old) hook-up site that claims to be “a place for friends.” Haha. Friends.

Anyway, there is also chemisty.com, but according to them, I had no matches. I guess this proves I really am strange. Boo!

Now let me be up front in the fact that I had tried this online thing back in 2001. I even flew out to Idaho to meet the guy. I then wrote about the fiasco in the Penn State campus newspaper The Collegian that landed me an interview at the Philadelphia Inquirer. Boy am I glad I don’t work there. Check out the latest here: http://www.newspaperdeathwatch.com/

Well obviously it didn’t work out as I’m still writing about love and relationships nine years later. (Hmmm maybe they should pull the plug on me here!) The reason: misrepresentation. He wasn’t whom he made himself out to be. From then on, I dated people I physically met first.

Fast forward to recently. While single, I got caught up in the match.com craze that infiltrates like the flu virus. It first started with my old roommate. She was like a crack addict. Every night she had a date with a different guy (with the same game, by the way- the same Chris Rock or George Lopez DVD and a bottle of wine … it was kind of creepy the way her laugh was encrypted like a sitcom laugh track). I thought she was a ho. Now I realize she was addicted to dating, for the most part.

So one rainy, boring night I signed up with the 20% discount, of course (I never pay retail, keep an eye on my next column for money-saving love tips). And so it began. I started dating-a lot. Either on the site, random people I met out or at the Philadelphia meet market New Year’s event (not so great for 30-year olds, great for those 40 and above by the way). I met a few nice guys but most turned out to be, well, jerks. For instance, after watching Michael Moore’s Sicko movie, I was even more appalled at the health care industry than usual. Turns out he worked for CIGNA and declared, “I don’t care what they do as long as I get paid.” Uhhh, next. Another date showed up 45 minutes late at a new, fantastic restaurant called Mango Moon in Manayunk. After drinking my way through the meal and his rude demeanor to the waitress, the check came. “Ummm, Cassie, if this was our second or third date, I would pay but since it’s our first date, I’m going to have to ask you to pay half.” Again…. next!

So somewhere after that, I passed along my account to another victim who then followed in the same pattern and so on. In two words, I can sum up the experience for everyone: overindulgence and over stimulation.

Virginia Mac Neil writes for the examiner.com and is a social planner for the love birds.  Her constant flow of unique and creative ideas for a night out on the town have kept people asking for dating tips for years.

She writes in her column today:

For anyone who is a member of a public internet dating website, how concerned are you that the wrong person just might come across your profile?  As a college professor, would you want your students to view your dating profile? Or what about a business professional in a conservative environment, would it bother you to know that your colleagues had access to this?  If this is something you might be concerned about, I just might have a solution for you.Recently, Joel M. Blatt, Founder of Sparkbliss, emailed me some information on what his particular website can offer for people interested in online dating & matchmaking.  Joel told me, “The best option to mitigate personal privacy concerns is private online dating® powered by Sparkbliss.”  The online dating site is similar to both eHarmony and LinkedIn, but in this case you rely on both close knit and extended groups of friends and family to screen other members and initiate possible romantic connections.  The website offers “private online dating” where your information will not be made public knowledge. Your profile can not be searched for on websites such as Google or Yahoo either.  Best of all, membership is free!

In a study conducted by Temple University, 63% of married couples had met through a mutual friend.  If that’s the case, then with the help of your friends and family, Sparkbliss could really be on to something. Your privacy rights are already protected, so what have you got to lose?